Surrogate partner therapy is rarely used in sex therapy, but more evidence shows it can be beneficial for some women. Intercourse, when it happens, will be much later in the course of therapy. Cooper said even if she could refer patients to surrogate partners, in most situations, she would not. Some question its legality, although no laws specifically prohibit surrogate partners, according to the International Professional Surrogates Association IPSA. But many experts say surrogate partner therapy has its place in sex therapy, and can be useful to the right patients. Although use of surrogate partners is rare among patients of both genders, they are increasingly being used by women whose physical or mental health problems prevent them from enjoying a healthy sex life , experts say. But some patients need more than talk therapy. Praise and criticism Some sex therapists believe surrogate partners to be illegal in their state.
Rotem believes he has helped patients. But many experts say surrogate partner therapy has its place in sex therapy, and can be useful to the right patients. Cooper said even if she could refer patients to surrogate partners, in most situations, she would not. Cooper said she would not know how to verify the background of a surrogate partner. But some patients need more than talk therapy. Rotem said a surrogate partner is always emotionally supportive of the patient, while this may not be the case in a real-life relationship. Because that person is being paid to do what they're doing," Cooper said. Nowadays, medications such as Viagra exist to help men with some of the issues surrogate partners used to address, Cooper said. In addition, "I think there's strong potential for a client to attach themselves to the sex surrogate, and fall in love with them and not be able to move on," Cooper said. Every patient is different, but most of Rotem's patients require intercourse as part of their treatment, he said. The trend seems to be international. This may be one reason for the general decline in the use of surrogate partners. She recently contacted Rotem to say she had been dating a man for three months and was vacationing with him in Hawaii. However, she has never worked with a surrogate partner herself. Some question its legality, although no laws specifically prohibit surrogate partners, according to the International Professional Surrogates Association IPSA. They don't just want sex therapy to please their partner. What surrogate partners do Surrogate partners work with their patients to build their communication skills and self-confidence, and help them become more comfortable with physical and emotional intimacy. At the end, all of those who had surrogate partners saw their condition relieved, while 75 percent of those in relationships did. And the therapy comes with baggage, including the risk of the patient becoming attached to his or her surrogate partner. Often times, particularly with men who are late virgins, it's more important to address underlying social issues than simply "cure" a patient of his virginity, she said. Praise and criticism Some sex therapists believe surrogate partners to be illegal in their state. There's also some scientific evidence that surrogate partner therapy works for those with physical health problems. A study looked at the treatment of patients with painful vaginismus — 16 patients had surrogate partners and 16 patients were in relationships. They need practice in the bedroom, and have no spouse or partner to turn to. Rotem said becoming emotionally attached to someone is part of the therapy, and the patient is always aware the relationship is temporary.
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