Pauley says that Hope's "own political views. To keep the dialogue at a minimum, longing looks are at a maximum, so much so that the film often resembles a soap opera. The Trojan horse, when it finally makes its inevitable appearance near the conclusion, is a handsome super-steed indeed. Of course, I don't have his talent, but I copy him all the time. There are some pleasant surprises over the course of the evening, however, including comments from Woody Allen in which the filmmaker confirms his longtime infatuation with Hope's sublimely smart-alecky comic style, especially as it was displayed on the movie screen. Perhaps it's just that the source material has been done so many different times and in so many different ways -- including much better ones than this. For a basic-cable production, "Helen of Troy" does look impressive, and not just in its display of Helen's globular gluteal epidermis.
Wait, is a goat doing the horsing around? An independently produced documentary about the great man and his times would be a welcome change from tradition. Maybe if she didn't pitch such a fit every time she issues a new bulletin, folks would pay her more heed. Just about everything concerning Hope is of yore because the living legend has been kept out of commission by failing health for several years. Hosting the affair, unimpressively enough, is NBC's house hausfrau, Jane Pauley, who takes note of Hope's record-breaking year contract with the network and says it makes her contract "pale by comparison," a comment as irrelevant as it is self-referential. Marsden is a marshmallow, and Callis looks perpetually anxious, as if fearing there's a big tear in his toga. For a basic-cable production, "Helen of Troy" does look impressive, and not just in its display of Helen's globular gluteal epidermis. The Trojan horse, when it finally makes its inevitable appearance near the conclusion, is a handsome super-steed indeed. Imagine how thrilled Hope will be, if he's able to watch, to hear congratulations from the gang at NBC's "Hidden Hills. It's just at the moment Paris spots Helen, watching the fight from her perch high on a wall; they are the only moving figures. Daniel Lapaine is at least more spirited as Hector, Paris's brother, and Rufus Sewell gives off menacing vibes as the ruthless King Agamemnon. Also plenty of fresh fruit, suggesting the ancient Greeks knew the value of vitamin C. A brief excerpt from a routine Hope did with Ronald Reagan in the Lincoln Bedroom is a poignant reminder of what absolutely affable performers both of them were. Pauley says that Hope's "own political views. The semi-nudity is actually icing on the ratings cake; the film may do well on the basis of its sex and violence alone. There was a regime change at USA in the interim, but that may have little to do with it. A clip of Hope, in Vietnam to entertain the troops, showing a young soldier the first photos of his newly born twins. Considering the obsession networks have now with luring only young audiences to their programs, it's probably encouraging that NBC is even doing a Bob Hope centennial special. It's less a movie than a staring contest. Now, however, tackiness dominates. Shot on the isle of Malta, among other places, and prettied up with computerized special effects, "Helen" is fairly rich kitsch. Maybe someone else should be given a crack at honoring Hope. Hope's broadcasting career has been one long love affair with NBC. The year battle fought over her was "the most famous war in history," he goes on. Certainly nobody's going to tune in to see the stellar cast, because there isn't one.
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